Crazy in the City: The world is your urinal

My home office looks out onto the street. It’s not the prettiest view in the world, but there is some foliage and traffic to keep me entertained in  moments of procrastination and daydreaming.

I live in a decent neighborhood with it’s eclectic mix of whack jobs and professionals. Yet, it does not seem to matter what walk of life a man comes from, they all seem to view the great outdoors as their personal toilet. I cannot recount the amount of times I have been innocently looking out my window only to see a man walk towards the parking lot across the street while skittishly looking all around – heading either behind the green recycling bin (to the left in the picture) or behind the chain link fence (to the right in the picture) and quickly unzip their pants and let loose. I have seen men in business suits do this – I have seen punk rock kids do this.

Yesterday, I saw a nice car pull over – it looked new – and the guy who got out was well dressed. Assuming he was off to visit someone or go somewhere, I was shocked to watch him scurry behind the recycling bin and unzip – not even having the courtesy to turn around as he felt pissing on the building was an appropriate urinal. As soon as I realized this, I turned my attention to my computer screen, hoping to change the mental image in my head.

And this happens all the time. About a week ago, early evening, my partner was working in the basement with the door open. He was on the phone when he heard some rustling in our backyard. He ran outside to catch a (very) disheveled man urinating on the wall next to the open door! Confrontation ensued, and the men eventually left – but not soon enough as to leave stains on our new foundation. To be fair, I kind of expect this kind of behavior from someone in the state of inebriation that this man was – but this is not behavior reserved for such men. It seems no matter how well to-do, it seems when a man’s gotta go, he’s incapable of going to a gas station or waiting until he arrives at his destination….


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