More Term-Ending Questions
As the semester winds down in terms of time, it seems to be building up in intensity with a flurry of papers to write and last minute scurrying by profs trying to squeeze in the last bit of their syllabus into class time.
On the one hand, i have the feeling that things should, essentially, be winding down – concepts becoming clear, looming questions being answered, generally, i am awaiting some sort of satisfying finale to my third complete year at university (heaven help me!) Yet, this is not how i feel at all. After said three years completed, i feel like i am just getting wound up. The questions that are flying around at light speed in my head seem to get squeezed out faster then i can write them down. I enjoy being in an environment that makes my head hurt, and forced to think, but is the point to all of this ‘education’ simply to prompt me to ask more questions?? I want answers. I want a definitive answer to what power is. I want ONE interpretation of the post modern. I want to know what good all this technology is bringing us, if we are essentially in the same place as the greeks in terms of philosophy, politics and so much more! I want to hear a prof tell that the girl in the third row, who keeps arguing with him that her opinion is simply that… back it up or be quiet! (sorry – was another aggravating night in my media tech poli class – although i did make an appointment with my prof to discuss some of the issues that have plagued me most of the semester)
I know i know… if i want concrete, definitive answers i should have gone into mathematics or something (although i hear their debates can get quite intense at times hehe)
I truly enjoy having all of these questions in my head, dont get me wrong, but i am frustrated that i cant possibly read and digest all of the books that i want/need to read to understand things people say. Example, the SAGSA conference was wonderful, and i was indeed very happy to know who the majority of the theorists discussed were. (thanks to contemporary theory!) But the fact that, although i have read some Foucault, i was no where near as well read as those presenting papers. I dont mind people knowing more then i do, hell, its even better if they can explain it well, but i took so many notes about books, articles etc that i want to read… when do i get the time to do it? When can i just sit and read book after book after book, immersed in some other thinker’s words, without the hinderance of being graded on my ability to reiterate my understanding of it?
Guess its time to debug my brain – and go watch some mind numbing television before bed…